The 'A' Victim

As scary as the title sounds, it is.

*looks sideways to see if coast is clear*

*runs for dear life while flailing hands and screeching like a wild, messed-up baboon*

credit

Okay so I'm definitely not the first person to preach "The number of A's on your transcript don't matter", but I feel that I, too, would like to share my own experience of being "The 'A' Victim"
*evil laugh and creepy flashing lights*

First of all, I was admitted to a regular daily school for both my primary school years and lower secondary school years. That's age 7-15 years old for you peeps who's asking. Typically, the goal of each student is to score as many A's as they can get for the standardized test at the end of primary school and lower secondary school known as UPSR and PMR respectively. As a result, lots of time and money are spent towards ensuring that a piece of paper has stacks of A's printed on it. I, of course, wasn't excluded.

"But ma'am, are you saying that I should neglect studying altogether?" questions an imaginary young girl with innocent blue eyes.

"Absolutely not!" replies the author of the blog, suggesting to the imaginary girl to read until the end of the post to truly understand its contents.

Me from the past spent most of her days studying for exams. With her big brother in boarding school and her dad in a different state (due to work reasons), she was only home with her mom with nothing to do for fun but watch tv or surf the Internet or play games. That was her typical daily routine: study, TV, Internet, games, and sometimes going out on the weekends. Me from the past, unlike me from the present, didn't think the routine was boring, for she had been going through a similar cycle ever since she could remember. Of course, she undoubtedly have an unbroken chain of A's on her UPSR and PMR transcript.

Now back to the future: the present. Upon entering upper secondary education at PERMATApintar, I have begun to question what me from the past have learned. All those years in school and I've learned too few, if anything, about life. I've learned too few, if anything, about myself. It is in PERMATApintar that I've discovered so many things; more than what I've discovered hitherto. Going through interviews and college applications, I learned that your personality is what sets you apart from everyone else.

So, as a student, what should you do? Sure, your exam scores do somehow reflect how responsible you are with you current job: a student. The goal of getting an A is a decent one, and everyone should have that goal. However, you should never, ever let that goal limit your vision of the endless discoveries of life. Explore your interests, do what you like. e.g. If you are intrigued by science, join some science program out there, read about it, and let your inner curiosity take over. Why? Because the answer to the question "What do you wanna be when you grow up" can only be answered with full honesty if you know what exactly makes you jump up and down for joy.

There's lots of things that you can get involved in, and it does not necessarily have to come from the school. The Internet is absolutely a great way to start (for you younger ones, I believe adult supervision is necessary). Engage in science forums, join an online art class, read advanced literature if you're a lit geek (I'm sure they exist somewhere on the web). Learn about your religion, memorize the Quran, learn a new language, read about what happened today in history. The possibilities are endless!

credit

It's a bit late of a realization for me. But I guess this experience has enabled me to write this post today from a personal point of view. It's not until I entered PPN that I started taking baby steps away from the hands of the A catastrophe. I've recently just completed my first year in college. In my second year I experimented my time management skills by taking part in so many different things that I barely have time to study. But it all turned out okay.

The bottom line is, whenever you see a chance for you to make a journey of self-discovery, grab it, even if it means losing (some of) your study time.

Trust me, I'm a college student B)

Freshman Year (and I'm gonna be here for the next four years)

Credit

Freshman year as a UofI student, I lived in the residence halls. More precisely, a female-only residence hall by the name of Busey-Evans, located in the heart of campus. They say living in the halls is expensive (which, in fact, is not false) but my one-year of being a resident of Evans, I dare say it's worth the hole in your poket. And I'm about to share with you why

1. Friends

I'm neither good nor quick at making friends. Often times, I find myself befriending very few people, compared to others. But there's a perk of being in some place new where absolutely no one knows you: they don't know you! As in, you can be anyone you want when you meet them the first time.

So I used this idea to approach random people in the dining hall and say, "hey, can I sit here?". And that's how most of my friendships come from. What makes this easy is that almost everyone in the halls is freshman, and all of them are eager to make new friends. So why not give it a start huh?

I was one of the fortunate ones who ended up rooming with one of the closest friends that I made during my first year. She's a Korean who happens to live in malaysia because her father owns some kind of Korean market somewhere in KL, so we had a common ground to begin with. Then she met this Asian American (literally means a chinese who was born in America) and the three of us became really close friends. See, although I have trouble making friends, I do cherish friendships that I can rely on, like these two.

Asian-American, Malaysian, Korean-Malaysian

2. Food (not really)

Well, when you keep seeing the same food over and over for a whole year, you'd probably develop a sense of hatred towards what they call "dorm food". And imagine just being able to eat rice with tasteless vegetables and if you're lucky, with fried shrimp or salmon. They do have a variety vegan options such as spinach lasagna and spaghetti but still... I want my sambal belacan!!! T_T

I was very lucky they had rice for every meal. I think that I could possibly become a zombie if I dont consume rice for a day. Huh... Asian crisis. On the positive note however, having meal plans mean that you do not need to bother preparing a meal for yourself. It's all ready and all you need to do is go downstairs to the dining hall

This is the point where I got so tired of their food

3. Location

Omg this is my favourite part! Okay the thing I really love about my hall is its proximity to most of my classes on campus. One time, I woke up 20 mins before class and I literally just jumped out of bed, washed my face, brushed my teeth, got ready and ran off to class. And I made it in time!

Okay sure, I cheated. I didn't shower. (don't tell my 8am lab partner that I never shower before I come tp lab. dont judge me!) But who cares? I wasn't late
This wouldn't have been made possible had I lived further. I would have to wait for the bus but even then I'd be late. I usually walk to class from my halls and I love walking.

4. Resources

Yup. You paid loads for this baby. Might as well just use it. There's a gym which is walking distance from my halls. Sadly I seldom visit it :( I used to go once a week in Fall but the frequency significantly decreased in the next semester. They also have a library and a computer lab in the halls. Both are great study spaces.

Bottom line? From experience, I believe that spending that extra cash to live in the residence hall your first year is definitely worth it, provided that you don't stay cooped up in your room watching Netflix all day. :)

Plot Twist #0

Plot Twist:
I've decided to disregard my previous intention of abandoning this blog once and for all.

So hi guys! I'm back!

krik krik krik

Anywho, I've come to realise that I just cannot abandon writing altogether. My life is incomplete without type-type-typing out ridiculous things on a blog every once in a while. Wasting your time is all part of the plan.

I must say, my writing has been reduced to a level lower than I could imagine possible - so low that it's wearing fluffy UGG fur boots. *budum tuss*

It's okay if you didn't get that part. I told you how strange my writing is after a while. Which is why I believe this comeback is necessary.

To get things started, let's ramble about the thing that's happening to me right now: finals.
DUMDUMDUM.....

Wow. I can't believe how fast time flies. I know it's common to say that, but only coz it's the truest truths out there. I've ended my freshman year in college. I'm moving on to the next phase: sophomore. A phase where I have no excuse of not knowing stuff or messing up. "You're no longer a freshman" someone might remind me even though I do not need any reminders that I am already getting older. Responsibility ain't as appealing as it sounds peeps.

Well, gotta get back to the stack of papers to my left that's used as scratch paper for my Computer Science final exam practice and also my calculus. Who knew writing codes on paper can be so frustrating.

Anticipate future posts peeps.

Kali Pertama

i.

I was walking down the aisle in the library (UIUC UGL at that), looking at the books and at the same time thinking about how Malay dramas picture two college students have eye contact when they were in a situation similar to one that I was currently in. I was waiting for that moment to happen to me - a (cute) guy would be on the other side of the bookshelf, searching for books but found me instead. But guess what? It didn't! There wasn't a single soul down the aisle apart from me.

And as I sat down at one of the empty tables in the library, I awaited with patience for a guy to just approach me saying, "Hey, can I sit here?". Then we would start getting to know each other and he would start having a crush on me and he would buy me things, drive me places, give me free rides, do anything I ask him to do and in the end I shall dump him (this has been explained in my previous post, Kontradiksi). This library-is-where-I-met-that-special-someone situation has been shown in numerous dramas. Surely they must be true right? Wrong! I sat there for five whole minutes and still no sign of any cute guys wanting to sit with me. :(

So I made a drastic conclusion: Dramas are the biggest liars of all time. Period. That's why I gave up on dramas since the beginning of time. They simply give you false hopes, like the one I had while standing between two huge bookcases. Fictions give you false hopes too. Well, everything in this worldly life gives you false hopes. Hooray for that.

This thing is too cute :3

ii.

Just yesterday I was attending the Speech Team info night, wondering what the hell I was doing there. I mean, I am in no circumstances interested in such a competitive activity. So why the heck did I sign up for something that I know I won't want to get involved in? This ultimately brings me back to something someone said during the MSA (Muslim Students Association) girls meeting:

"Try something new. I never liked tomatoes. Someone made me ate it and now I kinda like it a bit."

Try something new. Speech Team? Nah.. I'm still not interested. I did try to eat steamed/boiled Brussels Sprout and it turned out to be disgusting. And I used to wonder how real strawberries and blackberries and raspberries tasted like. I didn't like them. I prefer grapes. I danced. No, not real dancing. There was one night when our RA invited us to play Wii. I always wanted to play Wii. I thought we would be playing football or something. But no. We danced. And I kinda liked it a bit.

Another thing I would like to highlight is that during the orientation, the Dean promised all of us students that we would not be the same person as we are now when we graduate from UIUC. I wanna see that one come into play. Probably I'll go around dressed up as a chicken or something. That's something different right? Well, on a more serious note, I am hoping to change for the better. People change, so let's make that change beneficial for us and for those around us.

iii.

I was got on the bus to go back to my dorms. There was an empty seat next to me. Upon realising that, a guy whom I don't know just came by, sat on the empty seat, held out his hand and introduced himself to me. I was surprised to say the least, but I immediately apologized, saying I can't shake hands with him. He seemed cool with it. He was being really friendly, and I am not very comfortable with guys who are "too friendly". We had a small chat about the usual: what's your major? where do you live? etc. Then there was silence. Like, dead silence. Awkward silence. So awkward that I wish things would have turned out differently; I could've gotten on another bus, I could've just stood in the bus, I could've just chose to walk. But the thing is, I didn't! And now I'm stuck in this dimension of awkwardness, if that even exists. By the time I got off the bus, he said "Bye" to which I reciprocated with the same word.

That was one of the most embarrassing moments in my life.

iv.

Anywho, it's Jumuah and almost two whole weeks of me in the United States and one whole week of being a college student (see the word I used there? "college"). Miraculously things have gotten well enough for me (Alhamdulillah). PERMATA seniors love to mention how their experience in PERMATA has aided them in life in university, and I would like to agree upon that. You see, back in PERMATA there was all this pressure of getting assignments and other stuff done. Be it volunteer work, research, making a model of a stadium, and now I am more than grateful with what I have gone through in PERMATA

I happen to be enrolled in a compulsory English Rhetoric course. It was something about thesis writing. And the instructor said, "I guess all of you must've worked on a thesis at least once" and I thought about how lucky I am to have had the opportunity of writing a research paper previously. So I didn't feel that much left out when the others nodded to the instructor's statement. There are lots of other instances that I can set forth, but this insignificant little blog post could not contain such personal diaries of the author herself. (I do have a diary if you must know)

v.

I am looking forward to a great 4 years of college life. As for others who might be reading this: pursue your dreams. You'll get to where Allah wants you to be. InsyaAllah.

Just another quick note: A lot of people said that my name, Aini, is a pretty name. Kbye