The 'A' Victim

As scary as the title sounds, it is.

*looks sideways to see if coast is clear*

*runs for dear life while flailing hands and screeching like a wild, messed-up baboon*

credit

Okay so I'm definitely not the first person to preach "The number of A's on your transcript don't matter", but I feel that I, too, would like to share my own experience of being "The 'A' Victim"
*evil laugh and creepy flashing lights*

First of all, I was admitted to a regular daily school for both my primary school years and lower secondary school years. That's age 7-15 years old for you peeps who's asking. Typically, the goal of each student is to score as many A's as they can get for the standardized test at the end of primary school and lower secondary school known as UPSR and PMR respectively. As a result, lots of time and money are spent towards ensuring that a piece of paper has stacks of A's printed on it. I, of course, wasn't excluded.

"But ma'am, are you saying that I should neglect studying altogether?" questions an imaginary young girl with innocent blue eyes.

"Absolutely not!" replies the author of the blog, suggesting to the imaginary girl to read until the end of the post to truly understand its contents.

Me from the past spent most of her days studying for exams. With her big brother in boarding school and her dad in a different state (due to work reasons), she was only home with her mom with nothing to do for fun but watch tv or surf the Internet or play games. That was her typical daily routine: study, TV, Internet, games, and sometimes going out on the weekends. Me from the past, unlike me from the present, didn't think the routine was boring, for she had been going through a similar cycle ever since she could remember. Of course, she undoubtedly have an unbroken chain of A's on her UPSR and PMR transcript.

Now back to the future: the present. Upon entering upper secondary education at PERMATApintar, I have begun to question what me from the past have learned. All those years in school and I've learned too few, if anything, about life. I've learned too few, if anything, about myself. It is in PERMATApintar that I've discovered so many things; more than what I've discovered hitherto. Going through interviews and college applications, I learned that your personality is what sets you apart from everyone else.

So, as a student, what should you do? Sure, your exam scores do somehow reflect how responsible you are with you current job: a student. The goal of getting an A is a decent one, and everyone should have that goal. However, you should never, ever let that goal limit your vision of the endless discoveries of life. Explore your interests, do what you like. e.g. If you are intrigued by science, join some science program out there, read about it, and let your inner curiosity take over. Why? Because the answer to the question "What do you wanna be when you grow up" can only be answered with full honesty if you know what exactly makes you jump up and down for joy.

There's lots of things that you can get involved in, and it does not necessarily have to come from the school. The Internet is absolutely a great way to start (for you younger ones, I believe adult supervision is necessary). Engage in science forums, join an online art class, read advanced literature if you're a lit geek (I'm sure they exist somewhere on the web). Learn about your religion, memorize the Quran, learn a new language, read about what happened today in history. The possibilities are endless!

credit

It's a bit late of a realization for me. But I guess this experience has enabled me to write this post today from a personal point of view. It's not until I entered PPN that I started taking baby steps away from the hands of the A catastrophe. I've recently just completed my first year in college. In my second year I experimented my time management skills by taking part in so many different things that I barely have time to study. But it all turned out okay.

The bottom line is, whenever you see a chance for you to make a journey of self-discovery, grab it, even if it means losing (some of) your study time.

Trust me, I'm a college student B)

Freshman Year (and I'm gonna be here for the next four years)

Credit

Freshman year as a UofI student, I lived in the residence halls. More precisely, a female-only residence hall by the name of Busey-Evans, located in the heart of campus. They say living in the halls is expensive (which, in fact, is not false) but my one-year of being a resident of Evans, I dare say it's worth the hole in your poket. And I'm about to share with you why

1. Friends

I'm neither good nor quick at making friends. Often times, I find myself befriending very few people, compared to others. But there's a perk of being in some place new where absolutely no one knows you: they don't know you! As in, you can be anyone you want when you meet them the first time.

So I used this idea to approach random people in the dining hall and say, "hey, can I sit here?". And that's how most of my friendships come from. What makes this easy is that almost everyone in the halls is freshman, and all of them are eager to make new friends. So why not give it a start huh?

I was one of the fortunate ones who ended up rooming with one of the closest friends that I made during my first year. She's a Korean who happens to live in malaysia because her father owns some kind of Korean market somewhere in KL, so we had a common ground to begin with. Then she met this Asian American (literally means a chinese who was born in America) and the three of us became really close friends. See, although I have trouble making friends, I do cherish friendships that I can rely on, like these two.

Asian-American, Malaysian, Korean-Malaysian

2. Food (not really)

Well, when you keep seeing the same food over and over for a whole year, you'd probably develop a sense of hatred towards what they call "dorm food". And imagine just being able to eat rice with tasteless vegetables and if you're lucky, with fried shrimp or salmon. They do have a variety vegan options such as spinach lasagna and spaghetti but still... I want my sambal belacan!!! T_T

I was very lucky they had rice for every meal. I think that I could possibly become a zombie if I dont consume rice for a day. Huh... Asian crisis. On the positive note however, having meal plans mean that you do not need to bother preparing a meal for yourself. It's all ready and all you need to do is go downstairs to the dining hall

This is the point where I got so tired of their food

3. Location

Omg this is my favourite part! Okay the thing I really love about my hall is its proximity to most of my classes on campus. One time, I woke up 20 mins before class and I literally just jumped out of bed, washed my face, brushed my teeth, got ready and ran off to class. And I made it in time!

Okay sure, I cheated. I didn't shower. (don't tell my 8am lab partner that I never shower before I come tp lab. dont judge me!) But who cares? I wasn't late
This wouldn't have been made possible had I lived further. I would have to wait for the bus but even then I'd be late. I usually walk to class from my halls and I love walking.

4. Resources

Yup. You paid loads for this baby. Might as well just use it. There's a gym which is walking distance from my halls. Sadly I seldom visit it :( I used to go once a week in Fall but the frequency significantly decreased in the next semester. They also have a library and a computer lab in the halls. Both are great study spaces.

Bottom line? From experience, I believe that spending that extra cash to live in the residence hall your first year is definitely worth it, provided that you don't stay cooped up in your room watching Netflix all day. :)

Aku... Survive?

Hisyam was currently wearing the t-shirt that he had just bought (or should I say, fooled into buying) at the reject pile.
Wani: Hisyam, ko tak panas ka pakai baju tu?
Hisyam: Aku memang hot. *muka mintak tumbuk*

Aku: Hisyam, kenapa besar sangat baju tu?
Hisyam: Well, I'm a big boy now. =='

At the surau, Wani, Alifah and I were discussing about Hisyam. Somehow forgot the exact conversation, but it goes somewhat like this

Aku: Budak laki kat depan dan belakang la

Wani: Tapi aku tak boleh la tengok Hisyam kat belakang.

Alifah: Ha betul. Tak boleh .

Aku: Kalo Bakte, Haziq, Aiman atau Nur boleh lagi

Alifah: Hisyam masih budak-budak sangat la

XD

Okay. The above is just a small hint about this lil' brother of mine who happens to be a bit wacky and not right in the head as time goes by. Now to the main part of the post.

If I were given the choice of walking or riding a car, I'd choose the former.
If I were given the choice of going out on my own or going out with family members, I'd choose the former.
If I were given the choice of going out alone or with my friends, I'd choose the former.

It suddenly came to me that through all these years of me being a Sabahan, their degree of independence survival has pretty much rubbed off on me. Some of you may not understand, but in my previous school, most of the students' mode of transport is their own two feet or the minibus. As I reach Jalan Bundusan I could see those from Kg Baru heading towards school on foot, and to say that school is just a stone's throw away may be a bit too much. It's a fifteen to twenty minutes journey I guess, if you use the jalan tikus which is a shortcut that happens to be forbidden by the teachers. Thankfully enough for me, I left TTF not without the experience of using that path. We went to CKS during kelas latih tubi PMR for some drinks. Yeah. As for outing, people usually use the minibus (of which the route has permanently found its spot to settle in in my memory) to go to city centre. Teenagers there almost never rely on their parents, and are usually free to roam at their pleasure. Of course pros and cons are there but no need for me to elaborate on that.

Adventure? I think my senior year is already jam-packed with adventures as we speak. It first started off with going to Low Yat Plaza. It was my very first time facing the huge city of KL without my parents, and I felt a deep satisfaction of being able to complete that. Probably the toughest part was switching between monorels and KTMs and stuff. If you want to know how a sardine feels like, please don't hesitate to go to KL. It's a good thing Izza was there to accompany me, or it'll be way creepy o.O

My next outing was to Jalan TAR when Aishah and Farra were planning to go there to hunt for some tudung. KTM. LRT. Again more adventure of buying the token and bla3. Then recently I went out with some juniors to Bangi Gateway but that wasn't much of an adventure since we used taxi service.

And the most recent adventure yet is the one to Kajang in search of supplies for the jualan kelas.We wanted to use the bus but then it was full so we had to use KTM after all. The destination was damn far from the KTM station. Aiman made something funny at the lorong when he speeded up to "go to platform 9 3/4". That was hilarious. We proceeded to MyDin and the horrible air and hot weather made me sweat profusely. By the time we finished buying everything, it was already dark outside. After solat Maghrib, we met at the reject bundle. LOL. The guys were fishing for some cheap clothes to buy.

We want foooooooooddddddd XP

After that, we searched high and low for food but ended up eating KFC. Haziq looked so sad and I felt so bad. I can't bear to see the look on peoples face when they're upset or unhappy, so please jangan tunjuk muka sedih-sedih depan aku. That's my weakness perhaps. Tapi kalo tunjuk muka fake memang aku tumbuk la. I mentally conjured up a few sentences that might cheer him up but none actually came out. Maybe my only means of communication with him is through insults? Okay just a hypothesis. Entah lah. rasa pelik pulak kalau aku cakap baik2 sama dia. Haziq, makanlah. Aku fahamlah perasaan bersalah bila dibelanja tu, tapi kau tak bersalah apa-apa pun. Aku tau kau lapar tu. Tak payah la mau tipu sebab semua orang pun tengah lapar. It's not a big deal la. Belanja makan ja pun. Bukan kami beli kereta untuk kau. Tolong la... Mau jak aku cakap sama dia, "Ui, bikin panas bha jugak kau nie. Tapuji betul. Urang sudah beli makan jak la bha. Tumbuk kau sana" (tapi takkan aku mau cakap macam tu kan. nanti lagi la dia x mau makan XD) Hahahahahahaha. But in the end, dia makan juga... Tapuji betul owh

Muka Aiman... Epic XD

Anak dan mak :3

The Essay

It's been a while since I last updated this blog. Apparently my mind has nothing to say for the time being, either due to the fact that the week has been hectic or that it simply refuses to function say anything. So, what's so damn hectic about the week? Cultural Day. I'm in the Borneo team and we're pretty much busy doing the best we could to make sure the audiences would be left in awe and amazement. 

Just the other day - Monday to be exact - I squinted my eyes to look at my calendar and realised that something huge is gonna happen on Friday. I wrote there "Illinois noti =='". Yup. I have applied for UIUC and the notification is to be released sooner than I thought. How fast time flies. Time and tide wait for no men. I have done my calculations. The noti would be out at 4.00 p.m. February 14th, CST which is equivalent to 2.00 a.m. February 15th Malaysian time. I can choose to stay up in anxiety - bite my fingernails and sweat like crazy - and wait for the release or I could peacefully be in my slumber and check it out first thing in the morning. Either way, I just hope to be mentally and physically ready for such a nerve-wrecking moment. In the end, it is Allah's decision that is best.

So, since I don't think you readers are getting any benefit whatsoever from reading my blog, it would be my greatest pleasure to share with you people my essay. UIUC application essay.

The prompt goes like this:

Tell us about one interest or experience................. Please limit your response to approximately 300 words.

You know what the toughest part is? 300 words. How do they expect me to tell a story in just 300 words? Well, I guess the reason is that they don't want the applicants to crap and waste their time (which I have a very high potential of doing). And here's my response. Took me quite some time to actually unravel my past and seek precious moments. Sure, you'll find way awesome-er essays out there but here it goes *gulp*

My name was never famous for sprints, long-distance, or any sort of running for that matter. But I wanted to prove, not to others but to myself, that I can push myself beyond the people's expectations. I saw nobody to my left or to my right, to my back or to my front. They were probably too far ahead or too far back, but I hoped for the latter no matter how ridiculous it sounded. 

4 + 2 hours

Memang patut pun aku dimarah. Malu tu.. Memang malu gila la, tapi kesalahan itu tetap pada aku. I'm not doing this hard enough. Not all out. I'm hesitating, that's all. Improvement comes but only with practice and determination. I take the plus side of the scolding that I just received (though the fact that the guys are right there staring at me makes the whole thing worse). I need to stay focused. Strong. This is the time I actually learn the skills that will assist me greatly in dealing with the remote future that I know not of. So why quit. I am no quitter. Period. I gauge my learning speed in sports and found that it is somewhat similar to my learning History. Slow. Snail. Molasses. Lambat. Aku tau, cikgu mau anak didik dia semua berjaya. I take her words as a push forward, and that's better for me than to think it otherwise. In the end, the softball team is just one big family. Kita nie satu keluarga. Jangan nak terasa-terasa. She's right.

A Board Game of Strategic Skills

Honestly, chess is not my game. I'm not saying this simply because I didn't manage many wins today (though some part of that does put a bit of an influence); but more of the fact that "strategy"? I'm not much good at it. 

Before you continue, it would be my greatest honour to state that this post may be long, dull, and altogether insignificant, so a piece of advice I could give to you at this point is to skedaddle. Scram. GTH outta here. Okay? Cool. As I've mentioned in an earlier post, I no longer have a diary and, this does act as a diary to some extent; and you'll be seeing words upon words upon words in this post, with only one photo at the very end.

There were 8 of us PERMATApintarians, four for each gender. You know what, when I think about it, I had been missing class quite a lot since the beginning of the year. From LDK to this chess competition, and stuff. What's more, I really don't give a shit. Yeah. That's my idea of a senior year. I don't want to leave school with no stories whatsoever to tell people. When I'm out of PERMATA, I want to be able to share an inch-thick memoir and not just some crap on homework and assignment. I want to break out of my academic-oriented self and venture things around me - even if it means sacrificing my grades (though I sure hope that won't happen. Na'uzubillah). All these years, due to the education system that brainwashes people into thinking that "You must score the national exams or else you'll be stupid", I have put too much thought into academic work. Argh. Scoring exams is one thing, learning is another.

Situasi di Dewan Makan

Hari nie banyak kejadian yang telah berlaku di Dewan Makan Pusat PERMATApintar Negara. Ada kejadian suka dan duka. Ok, aku tipu ja. Tiada sebarang peristiwa duka yang telah terjadi. Alhamdulillah

Situasi #1: Breakfast a.k.a Sarapan

Ada latihan sofbol pukul 8 pagi, so aku turun DM kira-kira 15 minit sebelum masa yang dijanjikan. Ada sekumpulan pelajar lelaki yang duduk semeja (seperti biasa, di hadapan tv) dan sekumpulan pelajar perempuan yang duduk semeja tidak jauh dari tv.
Tiba-tiba...
TV: UTC.. UTC..
Some guys and girls: Pusat pelbagai perkhidmatan... Berkhidmat, untuk rakyat... *aku tak ingat lirik*
Aku pun tak pasti apa signifikannya peristiwa tersebut sehingga mendapat tempat di blog post aku, tapi memang agak lawak + funny. UTC Televisyen ft. the PERMATA breakfast team

Situasi #2: LDK

Secrets. 4K1.

The silence of the night just crept in, only to be broken by the sound of the air conditioner and the fan. We were sitting in one group, all faces eager to listen to the next person. Two days, and we're going to be separated; some of us at least. That night was the only night that we could gather as a whole, as one huge family of 4K1, for in a matter of hours, some are going to be home for good, never to come back till the start of the following year insyaAllah.

We're having something quite out of the ordinary tonight; a moment of silence and appreciation for shared feelings, of how each and every one of us felt throughout this year. Indeed, being in PERMATApintar provided a whole new experience for its students, each with their own different back stories. I was glad that all of us were able to disclose this part of their lives and more.
I may not be the best when it comes to describing someone, but I'll try my best nevertheless. And I'll do it in alphabetical order.

Kuih with a Hole in the Middle

Being a both a Malaysian and a facebooker, you guys must've heard of the riddle "Banyak-banyak kuih, kuih apakah yang orang makan tepinya sahaja? Tengahnya tidak dimakan.". The answer is donut right? Well think again. This riddle had lived its days remarkably as one of those teka-tekis that gives people a facepalm. Not any more.

Unfortunately for that dear donut, companies such as Big Apple and Dunkin' Donuts start to rise, bringing a new generation of that so-called "Kuih with a Hole in the Middle". With fillings, creams, nuts and fruits at the centre of the donut, the riddle at the beginning of this post is proven to be invalid. (Awwwwwwwww) You may be wondering, up to this point, as to why I am discussing on this worldly issue. Have a look at the photo below

Gorgeous

A certain someone bought it for me when he went for an outing. And they're pink! With a slice of strawberry and tiny strips of white chocolate on top. Hooray for that. I didn't expect that he'd actually buy me something, but thanks nevertheless. By the way, I didn't have to place it in a burner. Nanti tak sedap la =='

Now I'd like you to imagine that you eat only the edges of the doughnut shown above, thus leaving its midsection. That would be such a waste wouldn't it. Boohoo. But I don't blame these companies. I am actually a fan of doughnuts (again, thanks for those doughnuts .. really appreciate it.. or them..). Doughnuts are often related to police officers, as seen in movies or American dramas. I still don't get why. They stop for some doughnuts before going for a pursuit.

Other varieties of doughnuts from the internet

The highlight for today is actually the International Mathematics Olympiad selection test (sorry for the divergence guys). I was the only odd-one-out. I mean, I wasn't even in the Math Olympiad class and then there I was, sitting for this very huge exam. Not that I was unhappy (Alhamdulillah I was selected to participate in this selection test), but it was the fact that I knew way less than all of the others.

However, I have learnt not to put down my weapons before I enter the battle. As I looked upon the question, the first one was pretty easy. The second one was okay if it weren't for the fact that I didn't understand the term "tangent internally" and "tangent externally". So answered what I thought would be the answer. Alhamdulillah, I could answer the third with confidence. But not the same can be said for questions number 4 and 5. I, having no other solution in mind, start thinking of matrices that we learnt in LA and tried to implement it. Didn't work.

A random photo from the internet

The time allocated for the test was 3.5 hours, but one by one stood up before me and got out of the examination hall. By over 2 o'clock, after only an hour and 45 minutes after the exam started, I, too, followed them. Seriously, I flipped the papers over and over, but still nothing popped up in my brain. Not actually hoping to be selected, but if I were to be chosen, then all praise goes to Allah.